ye olde crapfest

a short list of somewhat notable occurences and other assorted hogwash*:

• i got new tires! and new wheels! the ghetto rims are gone! my car drives tons better! anybody wanna buy some 17" chrome rims?
• the two week headache/inability to chew solid foods thing is finally beginning to subside...and i didn't even have to pay someone to fix it...
• car got hit in a parking lot as i ate at the aforementioned ramseys (it may have been tubby smith who committed the deed). twelve hundred bucks, they say. fuck it, i say.
• i saw two people who shouldn't have been having the sex having the sex and doing other naughty horrible disgusting things involving the toilet today, and i'll never be the same. i predicted this.
• jesse's "birthday ass" is no nicer to the environment than his regular ass.
• my dad rocks. i am turning into my dad. this isn't so terrible.
• valeria cummings is a horrible name to have
• the ghost lingers, but exorcism is in order. thank god i'm catholic by birth. it works best if you're catholic.
• four beers is apparently all it takes to obliterate me nowadays. is that sad or funny? or neither, or both?
• i visited a psychic who told me that in my next life, i would be a time-freezing witch. i am ready.
• there's a reason i haven't been writing much. it's because i suck at it lately.
• john swain's gonna join the navy jag program. you don't really understand this but that sentence is the most truly ironic and hilarious sentence i've ever written.
• i got the worst haircut ever last week. mulletudinous, almost. but i've come up with nine clever ways to disguise it until it has a chance to grow out a bit. i'm resourceful.

and that is enough for now. but big things are coming. i believe i am officially in motion...

* not all listed items are true. some of them are, in fact, false.

posting will be infrequent for a while, at least from me. i trust that the (moderately) hilarious megan pistachio and mr. myk nyx, (the only true 'rockist' i know) will manage to keep things fresh and fruity. and maybe destructo will show up and say something funny for once. you know, that's weird. you'd think he'd be funny on the line. not so, my friends, not so.