9.03.2004
where is my mind?
greetings, people of earth. here i am, rock me like a hurricane.
i spent some time murdering fleas this morning. the fuckers were crawling all over george, so i brushed him like mad. then they were crawling all over the brush, so i soaked it real good in some bleach. real good. funny thing is, fleas are apparently also "the undead," as the half hour immersion in bleach didn't kill them all. some gave up--the weak ones, obviously. others, the more tenacious ones, hung on during the deluge and once the water was off, they were back to jumping and being disgusting little fucking things. so i did what any sane person would do, i smashed them and then burned them.
so that was my morning. oh yeah, i also jogged. i've been doing that lately--jogging in the morning. i'm trying to keep my girlish figure so whoever i'm with at any given time doesn't desert me for a lithe young teen. also, the jogging is much more fun than watching podunk news.
i get to go home soon, or at least that's the word on the street. three and a half- day weekend! funny part is, they're sending me home sort of as "punishment" for being such a worthless p.o.s. the last few days... seems one of the bosses got curious as to what i've been up to and checked out my internet exploder history. so, of course, the logical thing to do is to call me and say
"alright, we're gonna send you home early tomorrow."
"um, okay?"
"alright."
well, i still get paid the same amount, so... um... wtf?
i can watch BOTH days of our lives AND passions today, yeehah! i waited for weeks while the olympics pre-empted my usual lunch fantasy world, and it was sooo worth it! last i checked, roman was "on his deathbed" having been "impaled in the foot by a spear," but had just enough energy left to make sweet love to marlena one last glorious time. and then there's passions, where the incest has finally come to light! it only took five years! i mean, i was pretty sure i had it figured out. there's one black family in town, if you're a black dude coming to that town to find your long lost parents and you end up bumping uglies with one of the only black family in town's daughters...odds are pretty good that you're doing your sister. and she's pregnant! GASP!
well, fuck all. let's get drunk this weekend, what say you?
in love and christ,
cmdrslappy, lord of the infidels
i spent some time murdering fleas this morning. the fuckers were crawling all over george, so i brushed him like mad. then they were crawling all over the brush, so i soaked it real good in some bleach. real good. funny thing is, fleas are apparently also "the undead," as the half hour immersion in bleach didn't kill them all. some gave up--the weak ones, obviously. others, the more tenacious ones, hung on during the deluge and once the water was off, they were back to jumping and being disgusting little fucking things. so i did what any sane person would do, i smashed them and then burned them.
so that was my morning. oh yeah, i also jogged. i've been doing that lately--jogging in the morning. i'm trying to keep my girlish figure so whoever i'm with at any given time doesn't desert me for a lithe young teen. also, the jogging is much more fun than watching podunk news.
i get to go home soon, or at least that's the word on the street. three and a half- day weekend! funny part is, they're sending me home sort of as "punishment" for being such a worthless p.o.s. the last few days... seems one of the bosses got curious as to what i've been up to and checked out my internet exploder history. so, of course, the logical thing to do is to call me and say
"alright, we're gonna send you home early tomorrow."
"um, okay?"
"alright."
well, i still get paid the same amount, so... um... wtf?
i can watch BOTH days of our lives AND passions today, yeehah! i waited for weeks while the olympics pre-empted my usual lunch fantasy world, and it was sooo worth it! last i checked, roman was "on his deathbed" having been "impaled in the foot by a spear," but had just enough energy left to make sweet love to marlena one last glorious time. and then there's passions, where the incest has finally come to light! it only took five years! i mean, i was pretty sure i had it figured out. there's one black family in town, if you're a black dude coming to that town to find your long lost parents and you end up bumping uglies with one of the only black family in town's daughters...odds are pretty good that you're doing your sister. and she's pregnant! GASP!
well, fuck all. let's get drunk this weekend, what say you?
in love and christ,
cmdrslappy, lord of the infidels
# posted by Nancy Cunningham @ 12:57 PM 
dude, you missed A LOT. turns out all the people "killed" by the "serial killer" were really just sent to an island paradise made to look JUST LIKE SALEM! everyone's betting that stefano arranged the whole thing, that bastard. and the current theory (which it looks like may be true!) is that whoever did this sent these people away and made like they were dead so that all of their husbands and wives and lovers back in REAL salem would get new wives and husbands and lovers. what a devious and expensive plan! "captive island" that's what they're calling it. SHIT i should write for soap operas. it could be my true calling.
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